WORK WITH ZACH

EPISODE 26: Victim Mentality

Mar 16, 2020

Artwork for podcast Overcome Pornography: The Self Mastery Podcast
 


 

Victim-hood and the blame game.

-      Not too many people think or express that they are the victim.

-      Not weakness, just our brain justifying our behavior

-      Indicators of victim mentality.

-      Blame

o  If my spouse would just meet my needs better

o  If I just hadn’t looked at porn that first time

o  If my church leaders would just help me more

o  The house clean on ramsey –

o  If only the circumstance was different

o  Ask yourself, do I blame anyone else for things that I don’t like about myself or my behavior?

-      Defensiveness

o  Byron Katie talks about defensiveness as the first act of war

o  That person doesn’t know my situation

o  My life is different.

o  No one else can understand what I’m going through

o  No matter what I do it’s never good enough

o  Zach driving

o  This is a place of defending your actions even though you might want to change but think you don’t know how

o  Ask yourself, is there someone in my life that is causing my pain?

o  

-      Complaining

o  I just can’t catch a break

o  Also, just plain negativity,

o  this is never going to work, nothing I do works

o  You feel sorry for yourself and feel trapped.

o  You know this person in your life, they are constantly looking to engage in a conversation that is negative..

o  Building a business has really challenged me in this area

o  I just have to ignore those thoughts and move forward with my best plans.

o  Ask yourself, do I complain    , do I excuse my behavior, are my thoughts and words negative?

o  

-      Key indication is that the stories that you tell involve “someone did something to me” “it happened to me”

-      “I was reading the news and the site showed an article that made me want to click further and that took me down the rabbit hole” – it just happened to me

-      Be careful about your words – look for a victim and villain

 

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